Bronezhilet

Competition: High-intensity insurgency weapon

21 posts in this topic

Engineers, designers, farmers, labourers!

 

I call you to the Glorious Task our Glorious Leader has given us! Our Glorious Leader has noticed that in the high-intensity insurgencies from the last decade fighters aren’t always using the most effective weapon possible. This cannot stand! It is our task to create a weapon that will give us a definitive edge over the enemy! Both in defending our Glorious Homeland against an insurgency and attacking infidel nations through the use of an insurgency!

 

Our Glorious Leader calls upon everyone to help, we are One Glorious Nation and we are One! Furthermore, our Glorious Leader has set no requirements, everything can be submitted! Farmers, sharpen your pitchforks! Designers, sharpen your pencils! (Sharpened pitchforks and pencils will not be considered a valid submission)

 

Although our Glorious Leader has set no requirements, he has a few requests for our new and Glorious Inventors. Although our Glorious Nation is a rich nation with many many smart people, there are some… less fortunate people. Our Glorious Leader has requested that you, if possible, do not exclude those people from using your Glorious Weapon!

 

Our Glorious Leader will pick a winner in two categories. The winner of each category will be awarded with the Glorious Price of €25! The categories are as follows:

-          Effectiveness compared to weapons in the same category

-          Overall impact on an insurgency

 

Our Glorious Leader has placed full trust in all of you, please do not fail him!

 

Further information:

 

Requirements:

-          None

 

Requests:

-          Cheap to manufacture

-          Easy to manufacture

-          Easy to use

These are not absolute requests, but relative to weapons in the same category. So a jet will not automatically lose versus a rifle just because it’s a jet.

 

Competition rules:

-          The competition runs until May 31st, 2017.

-          More than one submission per person is allowed, but only one submission can win a price.

-          Submissions can be in text, 2D and/or 3D.

-          Submissions can be any weapon, weapon system or munition (Except sharpened pitchforks and pencils).

-          The text, 2D and/or 3D art submitted must be enough to understand how the weapon works. The Great Leader will not ask for clarification. If the Great Leader cannot understand the weapon, you have failed your Glorious Nation!

-          The Great Leader is available for questions for the length of the competition.

-          The Great Leader holds the right to change the rules of the contest if needed. Contestants will be notified of changes.

-          Toxn, Loooser and Bronezhilet are the Great Leader (Judge).

 

Edit (15-4-2017): Allowed for the submission of weapon systems and ammunition.

Edit (17-4-2017): Looser added as third judge.

Zyklon likes this

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On 4/16/2017 at 0:31 AM, Jeeps_Guns_Tanks said:

I could be a judge, though I have an interesting idea for a self driving car bomb. 

Toxn, Loooser and I are a judge at the moment, so I think we're good on judges.

 

So good luck with that self driving car bomb!

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AutoCrowdStrike, innovations in automotive insurgency products, made in America!

If its got wheels, we can make it explode, on demand!

 

 

This brochure covers our new line of Self Driving Car Detonation products.  These products do not include any explosives. Our customers generally supply these themselves, but we do have sell molds and forms, for most domestic and import vehicles, for a seamless explosive install.  These tools will work with all current domestic and import self driving wheeled ground vehicles, since these vehicles all use the government mandated OBD III system.  These products are for self defense only!  We do have special bulk discounts for freedom fighters in need!  Warning for vehicles prior to 2020 that do not have the OBD III system, we have an adapter, but depending on the make and model, you may not get all the features or may have to make further modifications to the vehicle. 

 

 

 

1.       Low tech: Basic level, we send you a brochure, for $99.99

You have your fanatic type get in a self-driving car, have the car deliver him, he detonates himself on arrival. There are only a few advantages to this over having another fanatic drive the car.  One advantage is they are less likely to get lost.  This method is also less likely to attract attention, assuming self-driving cars are the norm.  The final advantage is, your fanatic can be trained to leave the car, and get closer to a target.

 

2.       Higher Tech:  The Beginners Hack Pack, $399.99

 

With this package, you get a hacking system that will allow you to choose a specific route for the car to follow. This allows you to guide the car bomb through areas where heightened security might detect it. This package also include a hard wired remote detonating system with several modes to choose from,  Detonate on Arrival,  Park with timer countdown,  or our favorite, The STUBER Surprise,  detonation when the door any door is opened.

 

3.       Super High Tech:  More options for the Car Bomber with high end tastes $599.99

 

This package comes with everything you get in the beginner package, but with options for full STUber support, meaning you can setup the car to be a self-driving Uber car, that works as one, until it picks up a specific passage or gets sent to a specific location. You can also use this mode in what we call free bomber mode, letting you watch where the STUBER bomb is using the cars on board sensors, so you can detonate when you see the perfect target! Perfect for when the STUber is stuck behind a pack of road bicyclists! The mode allows you to take control of the car for added fun!

 

4.       Mega High Tech: The Mother of all Self Driving Car Packages $1200.99 OUR BEST VALUE!

 

In this Package, as always with our mega packages, you get everything in the High and Super High packages, but even more! This package allows you to control more than one self-driving vehicle. This package puts in a control unit that can link up to ten, YES you read that right! TEN CARS! That’s TEN TIMES THE EXPLOSIVE potential.  This ad on module ties in all ten vehicles into an encrypted network, only you and you’re comrades have access too. They can go to ten different places, or convoy to one.  You can change or swap routs on the fly or swap any vehicle into STUBER mode. Really the options on this are almost limitless!

 

5.       Semi-Autonomous, Intelligent, Hunter Model 5555:  We call it the Terminator $5000.99 "Sarah Conner?"

 

This product is the crowning achievement of AutoCrowdStrike! With this add on module that looks very much like a google sensor assembly, you can turn any of our SUPER OR MEGA high tech packages into your very own wheeled Terminator. Once you upload a single source of social media, twitter, Facebook, even linked in or snapped chat, the AI then goes into learning mode, and will search the internet far and wide for info, then it we begin its AI stalk, and the target will never notice, because while it’s doing it, it tracks the target through their phones GPS, and works as an actual Google maps drone while it does it.  Because it knows where it’s target is, it will stalk until its routine is completely known to the Hunter model, while it is doing this it can send you encrypted reports on the targets activities, and will notify you of when it has a 100% probability of success, and give you several options on how to take its target our, with options for the single target, or when it’s with other groups.

Bronezhilet likes this

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I haven't read Jeeps' thing, yet, but for the record I think everyone's submissions should be a bit tongue-in-cheek.

You know for, uh, national security reasons.

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5 minutes ago, Sturgeon said:

I haven't read Jeeps' thing, yet, but for the record I think everyone's submissions should be a bit tongue-in-cheek.

You know for, uh, national security reasons.

What, afraid they're going to steal your idea?

Sturgeon likes this

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We could always just post a disclaimer on top:

 

THE FOLLOWING DOES NOT CONSTITUTE REAL ADVICE OR INSTRUCTION, AND IS PRESENTED FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO MAKE OR USE THE ITEMS DESCRIBED HEREIN.

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1 hour ago, Toxn said:

We could always just post a disclaimer on top:

 

THE FOLLOWING DOES NOT CONSTITUTE REAL ADVICE OR INSTRUCTION, AND IS PRESENTED FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO MAKE OR USE THE ITEMS DESCRIBED HEREIN.

Mine had a lot of tongue cheekyNess but I'll ad the disclaimer tonight

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15 minutes ago, Jeeps_Guns_Tanks said:

Mine had a lot of tongue cheekyNess but I'll ad the disclaimer tonight

The disclaimer was actually meant to be tongue in cheek too. Guess I didn't lay it on thick enough :mellow:

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I more meant that entrants should try to avoid looking like they are providing real recipes for insurgent weapons. You can get in hot water for that.

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1 minute ago, Sturgeon said:

I more meant that entrants should try to avoid looking like they are providing real recipes for insurgent weapons. You can get in hot water for that.

Like that stupid shit with Jeorge on Youtube over the vest review.

 

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