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Oh yeah, I can see Gwar doing a really superb live show.   Out of respect for the next artist's litigious tendencies towards youtube videos, I will not be posting any audio/visual material.   In t

Collimatrix's Terrible Music Thread  Collimatrix's Terrible Music Thread  Collimatrix's Terrible Music Thread  Collimatrix's Terrible Music Thread   Collimatrix's Terrible Music Thread    Terri

Now I have Nickelback stuck in my head...  

Reggae music is awful.  Everything the Nazis said about jazz; about it being the degenerate art form of a useless culture, is true about reggae.  Rocksteady and ska are far worthier, but if you wander a bit afield from Jamaica, you'll hit Trinidad which has steelpan and calypso, which are better still.


Yes, yes, ska is associated the American mind with The Clash and therefore heroin use, which is definitely a reliable indicator of artistic integrity.  But let's be honest; The Clash were kinda a bunch of whiny kids who sang about things that appealed to other whiny kids.


So, calypso music.  My favorite is Lord Invader:



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Since this is a terrible music thread, why not play some terrible music by a terrible human being? ISIS gangster rap mogul Deso Dogg who's tunes are going up the charts with a bullet... to the head.




Shocking that someone with such raw, undiluted musical talent should resort to extremism...

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No discussion of terrible South African music is complete without Die Antwoord.



And no discussion about Die Antwoord is complete without mentioning that they used to be Max normal (amongst, like, a million side projects)





I remember listening to Songs From the Mall and going 'oh hey, that's a ghost in the shell reference'.

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I really like Liz Phair.  I realize that this is not an intellectually defensible position, so I will not attempt to intellectually defend it.  Instead I will attempt to explain to the younger members of this forum, like T__A who will soon be going through puberty, the regrettable chain of events that caused me to end up a broken and bitter man who worships Satan and hates freedom.


Rock and Roll is America's ultimate weapon, though that's mostly because we're pussies about using nukes.



I never got to listen to '90s rock as it was happening because I was still in hippie indoctrination camp; memorizing the Woodstock band lineup and reading long passages of Timothy Leary.  They were planning to use us kids as weapons; put us in suicide vests filled with LSD and have us pretend to be boyscouts selling charity magazine subscriptions at the FDIC's offices.  They'd never know what hit them; they'd soon be dropping out, tuning in and turning on, and all of us little martyrs would be time-warped back to 1968 and be given seventy two not-quite-virgins.  Or that's what they told us.


What they didn't tell us, and what they couldn't have possibly known, was that the jihad was over.  The hippies won.  Hippies actually conquered the world in 1994, the year of the death of Saint Nixon, and they ran pretty much the entire damn thing before then.


The complete victory of hippies over humanity meant that the great wellspring of Satanic magic that they ran on went dry.  The hippie infection needs new hosts to remain vital; its total victory meant that there was no fresh blood for them to suck.  What they didn't tell us kids in hippie indoctrination camp, as we prepared for our one-way mission to stick it to The Man, was that Rock and Roll didn't work anymore.  Drugs don't work anymore.  Love-ins don't work anymore.


'90s rock was the last, desperate attempt to squeeze a few drops out of Rock and Roll, although by that time it was just called Rock.  It didn't work.  Nothing worked anymore.  That's what happens when hippies conquer the world.  We learned that anyone who works for the government, far from being scandalized and overwhelmed by the experience of LSD, is bored of it because all federal workers have a generous LSD stipend thanks to the Civil Service Reform Act of 1992 (one of Clinton's more deft maneuvers).  We were equally surprised to learn that LSD can't actually send you back in time to 1968.  In fact, much to the dismay of hippies, literally nothing can send you back to 1968.  That's all they want.  That they cannot have.  Time moves in one direction only, and that is towards the grim darkness of the future.


So yeah, indie rock and alt rock are sort of like the shitty, half-assed meth they blow up trailer parks trying to cook when they can't get the real stuff that's made industrially in Mexico.  Only imagine that Mexico has been overrun with vampire hippies who have started eating the topsoil, so Mexico doesn't exist anymore, and the vampires are starting to migrate North but you really really need some meth.


It may surprise some readers to learn that twenty-one years ago, lady rockers with a tough stage persona who were in charge of their own sexuality were something of a novelty, as opposed to being a prerequisite like it is today.  Or something.  Puberty was confusing, but I distinctly recall it involving vampire hippies coming after our topsoil, and a beautiful night on the East Coast with my then girlfriend at a Liz Phair concert.


So that's why, when you are a young man, you must chose what jihad you get involved with carefully.  Shop around; go to more than one terrorist training camp before you commit yourself.  Consider your options.  You're still young.  You don't need to commit just yet.

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Yes, Priory, that was terrible.


Alright, this will be a two-parter, and unlike last time, I shall endeavor not to have the shade of Hunter S. Thompson possess me.


I think I sold Fats Waller short with the clip I posted.  The quality on this one isn't as good, but it's a better display of what a phenomenal piano player he was:



If you can get ahold of a Fats Waller collection, do so.  He was really something.


Part 2:  Shit I listen to because I hate beauty and truth


This is Aberdeen; an exemplar of the genre of "twee pop."  I can make no apologies.  The sickness is within me.  It is too late.

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While we're linking stuff from bands making bad music in genres they don't belong in, have the only universally liked song from The Smashing Pumpkins' Adore:



I won't blame you if you tab away from the video.


EDIT: Oh god I listened to the album. There are only three good songs on it. They're in the first four songs of the album, conveniently enough. And I actually like a decent amount of goffik music.

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The subject of Eurovision came up in one of The_Chieftain's streams.  This is the only Eurovision winner worth listening to:



Lordi is KISS on steroids.  They've taken camp so far that they've come around full circle and made it into fine art.  How in fuck they play in those costumes I don't know, but they do.  They also take interviews and go shopping in them.




At this point in history, a band like Lordi is essentially a nostalgic art form.  Perhaps even a form of reenactment.  Parents in the 1970s were scared of KISS, Black Sabbath and similar acts and rightly so.  Rock is a purely Satanic art form, although by the 1970s worrying about it was superfluous; Satan had long since won.


Lordi is great fun because the 1970s were much more fun than the 2010s.  The 1970s were the last great hurrah of mankind.  In addition to the moon rockets and wiping out smallpox and fast jets, there was this great cultural vitality (at least in the West) that is so long gone that we need things like Lordi to help remember it.  The 1970s had horror films that were actually scary, as opposed to just being uncomfortable.  The '70s had real fear and real fun.  The 2010s only knows how to be more extreme, more depraved and more boring because nobody knows how to have fun anymore and just wants to see if they can still feel.



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    • By steppewolfRO
      I start this thread about music of Romania. Not sure if belongs here as will be more about older music than recent one but if it is more appropriate in the history section please move it there.
      Without further ado, I'll start with a classic folk-rock album of Romanian rock band Phoenix - Muguri de fluier (Flute buds) - 1974. After they run away from Romania they named themselves Transylvania Phoenix despite the fact that the band originated in Banat region. Obviously they were banned by Communist censorship but after 1989 their music exploded, especially in university environment. 
      Muguri de fluier album was perhaps the most played of all their creations due to its peculiar sound inspired from folklore ranging from Southern Balkans to gypsy music or Central European music. It is considered to be the best of their albums. 
      LE: about full album, only managed to link it this way: "Phoenix - Mugur De Fluier (1974) [HQ]"
      Few words about each song.
      Lasa, Lasa! (Leave it, Leave it!) it is just an interlude between songs that appeared on The Immortals soundtrack (1974)
      Pavel Chinezu, leat 1479   - about a local hero, guitar solo a bit a la Rory Gallagher 
      Strunga (The Gorge) - also for the soundtrack of Immortals movie. 
      Andrii Popa (name of a famous Hajduk) - song about an Hajduk known to free people enslaved by Ottomans. 
      Mica Tiganiada (Small Gypsiliad)  - dulcimer, bongos, violins, a very complex music inspired from gypsy folklore well sustained by rock instruments
      Ochii negri, Ochi de tigan (Black eyes, gypsy eyes)- an archaic sound which was initially considered to develop a rock opera based on it. 
      Muzica si muzichia  (Music and diminutive for music which is a slang word that I have no idea how to translate it, sing-song maybe or musicy as spending an Y is often taken as a diminutive)  - this song conserve the best the character of the music from Banat, the home region of this band with alternative measures and broken rhythm that reminds peasants' fairs music with oriental and Balkanic influences
      Mugur de fluier (Flute buds) - with Romanian  shepherd flute integrated between rock instruments, gives the name of the album; some say it's inspired from Christmas Song of Jethro Tull from Living in the past 
      Anule, hanule (Oh year, oh inn) - last two songs anticipate more their future songs, closer to hard-rock 
      Dansul Codrilor (Dance of woods)
      Songs from this album featured on the soundtrack of Nemuritorii (Immortals) movie. You can watch it here if you like with English subs. 

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