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Collimatrix's Terrible Music Thread


Collimatrix
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On ‎13‎/‎08‎/‎2017 at 2:07 AM, Collimatrix said:

Crack Magazine, (which is not the same thing as Cracked), has this excellent summary of the history of Satanic motifs in music.  It's a good little piece, but it skips two things I would have mentioned.  The first is the story of Nicolò Paganini, who in his time had a sort of proto-Robert-Johnson myth surrounding him, and less forgivably, occult-themed hard rock acts like Coven.

 

Coven is the missing link between Sympathy for the Devil and Black Sabbath.  In fact, they had a song called "Black Sabbath," as well as a bassist named Greg "Oz" Ozbourne (Which is not the same thing as Ozzy Osbourne).

 

 

Musically, they're typical of psychodelic California bands of the time.  If Led Zeppelin, with its heavy guitar blues songs about vikings, is proto-metal, then Coven is proto-proto-metal.  But their album art was pure fucking metal:

 

ogPwMBf.jpg

Incidentally, Coven is credited with introducing the sign of the horns to rock music, which is quite a brag.  

 

In a similar vein, but of more recent vintage is The Devil's Blood, from the Netherlands:
 

 

Sadly, they appear to have disbanded after a brief, but brilliant career.

"Jefferson airplane but about Satan" was the pithy version I heard once.

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On ‎22‎/‎08‎/‎2017 at 6:11 AM, Sgt.Squarehead said:

Going through the thirty odd pages of this thread is proving to be a lot of fun!  :D

 

Having a hard time figuring out if this thread is actually for terrible music though (the superb song in the first post strongly suggests not), anyhow here's the song that ruined Theresa May's day:

 

 

It's mainly an excuse for us to post stuff we actually like while being able to pretend that we're all too detached and ironic to have real feelings for things.

Well, that and posting genuinely bad music.

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39 minutes ago, Toxn said:

It's mainly an excuse for us to post stuff we actually like while being able to pretend that we're all too detached and ironic to have real feelings for things.

Well, that and posting genuinely bad music.

 

For the thread OP and namesake, these are one and the same. :D

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2 minutes ago, Sturgeon said:

 

For the thread OP and namesake, these are one and the same. :D

True, but Colli is also a ball of ironic detachment so tightly wound that it produces a sort of black hole of affected prose.

So it's not surprising that this concept becomes an ouroboros to him.

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17 minutes ago, Toxn said:

True, but Colli is also a ball of ironic detachment so tightly wound that it produces a sort of black hole of affected prose.

So it's not surprising that this concept becomes an ouroboros to him.

 

It's part of the cult indoctrination.  You end up memorizing small personal details about the posters, and thus get drawn inextricably into the web, and feel reluctant to ever leave because of all the effort you've put in.

You learn that @Oedipus Wreckx-n-Effect's blood type is O negative, and that @Tekky is insecure about his height and athletic prowess and will do anything to improve, including getting hit in the face with a volleyball for two minutes straight, that @LostCosmonaut loves cats even though they continuously bite him, and that @Toxn ghost-wrote S.M. Stirling's Draka series.

Soon, you feel like you really know these people and that you owe them some sort of reciprocal hospitality.  Then, before you know it, I'm sleeping on your couch, demanding that you cook me dinner and give me rides in old WWII airplanes, like I did to @T___A that one time.

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40 minutes ago, Sturgeon said:

 

Today I learned I need to keep Oedipus around as a blood donor.

I thought you shot him back in 2005 and have been keeping his corpse on ice ever since for complicated tax fraud purposes?

 

44 minutes ago, Collimatrix said:

 

It's part of the cult indoctrination.  You end up memorizing small personal details about the posters, and thus get drawn inextricably into the web, and feel reluctant to ever leave because of all the effort you've put in.

You learn that @Oedipus Wreckx-n-Effect's blood type is O negative, and that @Tekky is insecure about his height and athletic prowess and will do anything to improve, including getting hit in the face with a volleyball for two minutes straight, that @LostCosmonaut loves cats even though they continuously bite him, and that @Toxn ghost-wrote S.M. Stirling's Draka series.

Soon, you feel like you really know these people and that you owe them some sort of reciprocal hospitality.  Then, before you know it, I'm sleeping on your couch, demanding that you cook me dinner and give me rides in old WWII airplanes, like I did to @T___A that one time.

Hahaha, I wish. I'd be substantially richer than I am now if I had.

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3 hours ago, Toxn said:

I thought you shot him back in 2005 and have been keeping his corpse on ice ever since for complicated tax fraud purposes?

 

Hahaha, I wish. I'd be substantially richer than I am now if I had.

Better to get Stirling's riches than his looks...

 

photo2-e1334026070561.jpg

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13 hours ago, Collimatrix said:

 

It's part of the cult indoctrination.  You end up memorizing small personal details about the posters, and thus get drawn inextricably into the web, and feel reluctant to ever leave because of all the effort you've put in.

You learn that @Oedipus Wreckx-n-Effect's blood type is O negative, and that @Tekky is insecure about his height and athletic prowess and will do anything to improve, including getting hit in the face with a volleyball for two minutes straight, that @LostCosmonaut loves cats even though they continuously bite him, and that @Toxn ghost-wrote S.M. Stirling's Draka series.

Soon, you feel like you really know these people and that you owe them some sort of reciprocal hospitality.  Then, before you know it, I'm sleeping on your couch, demanding that you cook me dinner and give me rides in old WWII airplanes, like I did to @T___A that one time.

 

My current cat is actually pretty docile.

 

In other news, music in the music thread.

 

 

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13 hours ago, Sturgeon said:

 

Today I learned I need to keep Oedipus around as a blood donor.

 

My blood is booby trapped. Be warned.

 

13 hours ago, Toxn said:

I thought you shot him back in 2005 and have been keeping his corpse on ice ever since for complicated tax fraud purposes?

 

 

 

My secret is out! I'm actually dead.

 

The only things that helps sooth my horrid, undead heart are scantily clad stag women.

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4 hours ago, Oedipus Wreckx-n-Effect said:

 

My blood is booby trapped. Be warned.

 

 

My secret is out! I'm actually dead.

 

The only things that helps sooth my horrid, undead heart are scantily clad stag women.

Putting on my necro-psychologist's hat; I think your issues stem from your sublimated desire for your chosen psychopomp to release you from the crawling hell that is undeath.

Thanatopic urges underly at least half of the psychological issues of the undead.

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